They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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