I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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