I want to make a zoo with you.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
