is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I could fuck to npr.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
