he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
