he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
