That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
