I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
