I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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