Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
