dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
wow bdsm is so cute
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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