6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
