So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
