Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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