he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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