i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Randomize
