I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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