so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
