i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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