i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
