Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
