I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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