Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
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