what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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