reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
