your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
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