I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
