what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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