I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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