It's just like the Real World with babies
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
