so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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