Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
there was a trapeze. enough said
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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