that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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