My brain says no but my pants say off.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
