Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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