just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I came so hard my ears popped.
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