you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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