I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
