she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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