Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
