My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
