What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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