I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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