im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
