i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
