I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
