you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
