my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Sext me about skeletons
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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