Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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