Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
